It's Been Awhile
by Life the Fay
Summary: One of our beloved Ronins die and another with anmesia. Will he ever be able to make it through the pain? My first song fic! R&G!


It's Been Awhile  
  
By: Life the Fay  
  
Okay people, this is my first song fic so don't come killing me in my sleep. This song is 'It's Been Awhile' by Stain. And I also do not own the RW/YST! If I did, you would know. Now on with the story!  
  
~*~  
  
/It's been awhile since I could hold my head high. And it's been awhile since I first saw you. And it's been awhile since I could stand on my own two feet again. /  
  
The boy sat there in the hospital bed, looking quit confused by everything around him. He knew that he wasn't here just for amnesia but also for something else. Looking back down, he looked to his legs that could no longer work. Trying to move them again, it didn't look. Tears ran down his eyes it was his fault for all of this and now, he was about ready to have a life to die for his actions that he didn't know of. Looking over to the bed where a blonde lay, his eyes still closed just like when he got here. Somehow, he knew this gentleman but he couldn't place it neither could he with the others.  
  
/And it's been awhile since I could call you. But everything I can't remember as fucked up, as it all may seem The consequences that I render I've stretched myself beyond the means/  
  
'This guy must die for my actions! What did I do for this to happen? Why must it happen to him?'  
  
"Hey Touma!" the cheerful British accent spoke yet again followed by the other two. Not still knowing them, he felt he could trust them and listened to everything they told him. From what he heard, he and this blonde, Seiji, you lovers and that the three of them including a girl were there best friends. Shin looked over to where the blue haired archer was watching. "Has Seiji woken up yet?" Seeing that it didn't do anything, he wrapped his arms around him. "Don't worry Tou, he'll wake up soon."  
  
Touma smiled to the three, whipping the tears from his eyes. Thinking to himself, he said. 'I'm so sorry Seiji. If only I knew who I was and what happened.'  
  
/It's been awhile since I could say that I wasn't addicted And it's been awhile since I could say I love my self as well/  
  
It had been two days since he left the hospital without the blonde. Now, it was time for him to go to a place he wished he didn't have to.  
  
Shu sighed, looking into the archer's room. Seeing that he was in a quit nice black suit and that his hair was very nice than usual, tears began to form in his eyes. 'Oh Touma, why do you have to do this to yourself, why? I'm hurt as well, so as Ryo, Shin, and Nasuti. Hell, even Jun is depressed! I know you loved him dearly Tou, but it's time to let him go.please.do it for all of us.' Whipping the tears so that his friend wouldn't see, he came in smiling lightly. Kneeling down to his friend's height he said quietly. "You ready to go Blue? Are you sure you want to do this?"  
  
"I'm sure Shu. I need to stand up to my fears.or mentally stand up to my fears since now I have to sit instead of walk. Could you help me Shu?" Touma smiled to his best friend now that reminded him of a big teddy bear.  
  
"Touma.it wasn't your fault. It just happened." Shu politely spoke, feeling the fault and sorrow from Touma.  
  
He sighed. "I know Shu.I know." 'How could I do this to him? I don't deserve to live; I don't even deserve love from anyone! He should live, not me.'  
  
/It's been awhile since I've gone and fucked things up just like I always do But all that shit seems to disappear when I'm with you But everything I can't remember As fucked it may seem The consequences that I've rendered I've gone and fucked things up again /  
  
'I'm the one who destroyed my parents relationship. I'm the one who messed up their lives. I'm the one who almost killed the guys in the second battle with Arago. And now, I'm the one who killed my beloved Seiji. Why must all of the happen to me? Why? Am I that hated in this world?" Touma thought yet to himself, looking down to the man that he so adored and loved or that what Shin, Shu, Ryo, and Nasuti told him. He still couldn't remember much, only little fragments here and there. The more the guys talked about this "Touma", the more he thought he could never be him again. 'I might as well be dead!'  
  
/Why must I feel this way Just make this go away Just one more peaceful day/  
  
He woke in a soft bed feeling warm inside of him as the sun glowed over him. 'Am I dreaming? If this is a dream, then I never want it to end!' He thought to himself, opening his eyes to see a pale hand around his hips. Slowly turning around to meet the person behind him, he gasped. There, lay the blonde that was in the coffin that he saw that day. But why was he here? Wasn't he dead? Didn't I kill him? "Morning Starlight Angel." A soft voice said to him awakening him from his thoughts. Feeling the blonde's lips on his, he moaned loving the feel of being loved once more.  
  
"Seiji, is that really you? I-I thought you were dead?" Touma said hardly above a whispered, touching the soft face that he adored so much.  
  
He chuckled shaking his head. "Touma, of course I'm dead. Your just in the Sprit Realm, a place where I can see you."  
  
His eyes widen at the remark. No way! Could it be true? "I'm in the s- s-sprit Realm? But Seiji.you.and.oh god.and.Please! WHY WON'T ANYONE JUST LET ME DIE!? Please Seiji.let me be with you always.PLEASE!" the archer screamed tears streaming down his cheek.  
  
"Touma.you must wake up! Touma? Touma? Touma?" Seiji said only for his voice to vanish for the voice of Shin. "Touma? Are you okay?"  
  
"Yeah, I'm okay." He replied, looking over to the window.  
  
/It's been awhile since I could look at myself straight And it's been awhile since I said I'm sorry/  
  
Wheeling his way to the mirror, he sighed seeing another person in it. 'It has yet been a year and I still hold that burden. God, it has been so long.' He spoke into his mind combing his hair with his hands. He chuckled to himself. 'I don't even think of anything else but him. Seiji, please wait for me. I'll be coming soon.'  
  
/It's been awhile since I've seen the way the candle lights your face But I can remember just how you taste But everything I can't remember As fucked up as it all may seem to be I know it's me I cannot blame this on my father He did the best he could for me/  
  
On the dock near the lake on the Yagyuu property, he sat memories coming and going through his head as tears began to drop down his cheeks. Yet, he started gaining he memories two years ago when taken out of the hospital, there were still so many things misplaced and yet found. 'Why did this have to happen? We all were so happy. Now my father's dead, and my love is as well. I should have been there for my father then. Even if he wasn't there for me.I surely now can't blame this on him.he did the best he could for me.'  
  
/It's been awhile since I could hold my head up high And it's been awhile since I said I'm sorry/  
  
Night feel and what a terrible night it was when the blood striped the dark blue hair and forever closed the eyes of the bearer of those eyes that held the image of the midnight sky. A gun was on the floor and it appeared that the archer was finally happy in his sleep, smiling as they thought. Finally, Touma Hashiba was at peace. On his bed lay a letter with elegant letters in a metallic blue pen. 'So much like Touma.' Ryo thought to himself as he began to read the letter their dearest friend left with them.  
  
Dear My Beloved Friends,  
  
Forgive me for what I am about to do. It was and is my decision to go since I have lived long enough. I have saved the world from Arago, and so many other people and even fell in love with the most beautiful man in the world. Seeing his body died, I couldn't help but feel most of myself go as well. Now that my father has left to be with mom, I can't help but go. My love for them could never settle to a calm beat so this is my time. Please understand what I am saying.  
  
Shin, you were always a wonderful brother and cook. Always taking care of us no matter what. I still remember the times where I was ill and you wouldn't let me get out of be for a week! I still laugh about the time where Rhea, your dearest wife just pulled you into that kiss since you were so shy and she wasn't.  
  
Shu, stay cool buddy and I'll be waiting for ya with some food on the go. Just remember, I can kick your butt in eating any day and any time just make it and I'll be there! Take care of my precious angels you have with you Shu. Remember I'm still there Uncle Tree! Be good to Michelle and give her a hug from me everyday!  
  
Ryo, thanks for being there from the first battle and even to my death. You were so kind though; you did have a temper on you. Be yourself and take care of Nasuti and the little ones as well. Make sure that Shin and Shu keep their chins up as well as yours. And keep them on track!  
  
Nasuti, my big sissy, we have grown so close it's not even funny. How we always talked about our love lives and such. I can just remember when you and Ryo started out together. Take care of yourself and Ryo. I know it will be hard for you both but I know you can make it together with Anna and Rae.  
  
Rhea, a wonderful wife to Shin and an excellent mother to Lilly. My it just feels like yesterday when we first meet. Keep up your great work and I'll be looking forward on seeing you in a few years.or maybe more. Be good to Fishy cause I know him to well. Make sure to keep track of where your keys are. Yep, I still remember it and I'm not going to forget it.  
  
Michelle, a glorious lady that has always been there for all of us crazy boys. You better keep Alex, Alan, Brittany, Jamie, and Owen out of trouble and as safe as can be! Be that good sister to the guys and ladies and keep them strong and always don't give up. I know you will have a long and interesting life with my bro Shu!  
  
Take care everyone. Remember, I'll be waiting with Seiji at those gates for every one of you. I will always watch over all of you.  
  
Love,  
  
Touma Hashiba (Date)  
  
Shin patted Shu's shoulder. "We all knew this would happen. Just think, he will be able to walk and do all the things he once loved to do plus, Seiji will be there to take care of him. He's happier now. We'll see him later.both of them."  
  
Shu rubbed his eyes. "Yeah, he's happier. But he better not forget that we have a contest to settle when were together that deals with food!"  
  
"That's the spirit Shu! Just think positive.I know it's hard but.we know he's alright now." Ryo said, getting into the group hug they formed.  
  
"Yeah, and.SEIJI! IF YOU'RE UP THERE, YOU BETTER TAKE CARE OF HIM OR I'LL HAVE YOUR HIDE WHEN I'M UP THERE!!!" Shu yelled up to the heavens laughing when finished and walked away from the grave site that held the words: Touma William Hashiba.A Man That Shall Never Be Forgotten. May He Soar On.  
  
He looked toward the light, seeing a figure in front of him. Smiling, he walked closer, seeing yet a blonde smiling. "About time you came here. I was starting to worry. I've been waiting for awhile now for you." Warm arms wrapped around the blue haired archer. "Shall we go?"  
  
He smiled widely. "Lead the way, my Warrior of Light."  
  
~*~  
  
The End  
There you go everyone! One sad songfic.and it was my first! I'm quit proud of it!  
  
Seiji: Proud! PROUD!!! Why be proud of this? You killed me for crying out loud! I'm not supposed to die LF!  
  
Touma: You weren't the only one!  
  
Shin: be nice to LF.she worked hard on this. Besides, she not very happy at the moment. You know crisis and all.  
  
LF: Shin, thank you for understanding me! Now, what do you want?  
  
Shu: OH! OH! I want a Hot Spicy Chicken from Wendy's!  
  
LF: I wasn't talking to you.anyways please review!  
  
Ryo: Can I have a baked potato from Wendy's?  
  
LF: *sweat drop* No comment. 


End file.
